Updated: Dec 29, 2018
Today it FINALLY happens! I’ve been needing - yet procrastinating - this left shoulder surgery for about three years. I’ve milked steroid and peptide injections, lots of self-therapy and extensive stretching, some chiropractic and physical therapy, etc. for as long as I can. In November 2016, I had my right shoulder operated on because it was my “better shoulder”, and at the time, the doctor I had thought we’d get it fixed and stronger and then move to the worser left shoulder about three months post right shoulder surgery. My right shoulder has never been right (no pun intended) since surgery and recovery, so I’ve been uncertain and a little scared to even attempt the “worser shoulder”. (Shoulder surgery is said to be one of the worst orthopedic surgeries as far as pain and recovery go. It wasn't so much painful as it was uncomfortable and then turned stressful because of lack of sleep.) Plus, powerlifting came into the picture about nine months ago and anyone who’s ever tried powerlifting knows that among all it’s wonderful characteristics, it’s super addicting. So for the last nine months, I’ve passionately put off operating after seriously falling in love with this “lifestyle”. And then there’s the fact that my competitive and tough nature has “forced” me to believe that injuries are only as painful as you allow them to be. Rule of thumb at our house: if it’s not bleeding or bones protruding, there’s nothing wrong with you.
Which brings me into the next blog topic: the newly found mass that has prolonged this shoulder surgery the last nine days. I’ve yet to get the results back from the biopsy I had last Friday, but I’m not worried. I do know that it’s about the size of a golf ball, which made me giggle a bit when they described that as “huge”. I replied to the interventional radiologist, “If you measure “huge” with my 451mm (the diameter of a 45lb plate) standards, that golf ball is minute.” It’s not funny, I realize, but sometimes a good laugh holds back the tears, right?! And besides, there’s several reasons for my (honestly: anxiety driven) laissez-faire attitude:
1. I have God. (This is not a follow Jesus spill...although if you don’t, you’re missing out. XOXO) This “just” means that I was never in control anyway. His plans were plans before I ever knew what was going to happen.
2. I have amazing people in my life. Like seriously, make you cry and pray gratefulness all at the same time. My husband and children, my family in Texas, and my great friends (including my Iron Maidens powerlifting team) that camo as my Oklahoma family.
3. And of course the world of powerlifting. That word - powerlifting - in itself automatically makes me feel stronger. In my less-than-six-months of competing, I’ve met such inspiring and genuinely kind people in one of the toughest (or more precisely, the strongest) sports in the world. Who wouldn’t think optimistically when you feel like you have the support of a whole lot of kicka** people?
At the end of the day, my prayers my whole life have included: thank you God for_______...please keep my family, friends_______. Whatever the specific prayers were. Now I always add in “and my powerlifting and fitness family”. Because that’s what we are. That’s what Invictus Powerlifting promotes. And that’s why, in my opinion, we’re part of THE world’s greatest, definitely under recognized, sport.
When I next blog, it will be with my new bionic shoulder. By this time next year, that same shoulder that has held me back from pressing more than 225 will be the same shoulder that contributes to me benching at least three (six) plates!